It’s been a long day. there’s been the requisite eating and grooming but with the simians away and the blinds all pulled and my collegue asleep, it limits one’s abilities of perceive. I just got back from the 5th dimension but it was same-same, you know. Not much to report so this story on Cat box cleaners – when kitty litter attacks might be more up your alley of interest.

I lie in wait behind the window sill. Any moment now if routine holds, the little rodent-like creature will run out onto the patio any minute. And out it runs bobbing like a spider on a web in wind.

I crouch walk low the length of the wall of windows tracking the broad lengths of its frenetic lap-dog movement. It dives to grabs a shoe and shakes it wildly, loses it, pounces it again while I on my hindlegs, forelegs propped on the glass watch, feeling my eyes widen at the picture of pupness.

every species has a bell curve of intellience among the members and you can see in this archival cat video that this holds true even for cats.

I feel the heat of the strokes sink me to nearly empty fur of third heaven, my bones dissolve into lightly furred ligaments. There is nothing but breath and touch, heat and sweet communion.

When ears flatten it can be for more than teh stereotypical reason to hiss-readiness. There is also the squishing oneself into a proper good head rub, letting the digital delight scratch in all the right ways.

Dry food makes a lovely racket against the tin bowl, like hail on windows saying it is time to hunt shrews in the fallen leaves of autumn. The rustle of food bag so much like the oak and maple leaves. The squeak of distress just before I–

no wait, that was not reverie sound. It was me.

The last ping of sound in the food bowl was not a dropped kibble. My wobbly old fang has finally dropped free.

A fresh bloody-salt turn of affairs. I feel like grinning like some black labrador dog, if my face were built for it. No more banging it at awkward moments. I feel like a new cat.

I think I’ll be a wedgie between the two hairless talls. Oh dear, I think that translation may be off. Wedge or wedgie? I will sit in the small space between the two because a) it provides a way to be warm b) it provides a way for me to intercept and unscramble the hormonal and magnetic language passing between them c) it’s

oof. Hey, who are you to unceremoniously remove me from the couch.

Oh, you’re going to escalate the hormones like that again.

I’ll stand aside and take notes from here then.

I gave my best “you must be kidding look” at the dry kibble that came in seeming response to my clear call for wet and wonderful food. I do understand this is a simian joke day after all but really, that was supposed to end before noon and I’m seriously tired of this teeth scraping tidbits. You won’t quit? Fine. I’ll just go watch some jerky aquarium fish until you come to your senses. Or some live cam trained on fellow creatures

I was on the losing end of that battle for alphacy when came a surprise shut out via the percussive sound from those tall boxes that I can’t climb inside they call speakers.

(My colleague can’t stand any drumming but the simians seem to love to play it in my abode. )

She turned tail and headed for safety in a low run and I followed her at her tail, swatting her hip with my claws, giving a sound chasing. With Ms Zhou retreated to the closet I can score the chair, scent mark it like mad and that will make it so much easier to become undisputedly mine again. Victory sometimes drops onto your head like hairmatting soft duck and sometimes it is sometimes handed to you on a tin plate as an unexpected coup.

They are in the other room, we a moment of privacy and I grab Ms. Zhou back the scruff of her neck and oull her head back. She protests but since she protests everything always it draws no attention to us. A moment later I am giving her a shamelessly thoughough face and head licking when we hear a sudden shuffling of papers and shifting of body weight and a lurch in our direction. We hardly have time to look nonchalant while being found uncharacteristically sitting side by side when the hairless tom enters our room.