Anti-phobe day & poetics

It’s Anti-Hobit day. Anti-homophobia, Anti-Bi and Anti-Trans. Be aware of bias.

When you write, you write from l your place and personhood. Class or processing past places or examining where you are. It may be inner place, the over-caffeinated jumpiness of anxiety or the centred calm that shapes syntax and what accumulates.

The present leaks in: when downtown homeless people walked through my poems, in suburbs, squirrels. In the countryside trees. 

Calls, especially for haiku, like the primacy of name and city. but for 3/4 of my life I haven’t been in a city. 

The question presumes the rural away. It also presumes you are male and not stalked and want to occlude where you live. It’s more awareness of systemic bug than daily fear.

Knowing where someone lives is a power. I remember high school boys talking on the bus, scheming of what they’d do to the French teacher’s mailbox. One knew where she lived. Should I have warned her? Outted the general bully ringleader? They egged it and smashed it. She looked rattled.

When I lived downtown I had a food blog. I was invited to a friend’s friend’s birthday in a nearby building. Someone there greeted me by name. Have we met? 

No but it had to be you he said. He told me some things about myself. He explained, I was googling for restaurants, and came across your blog then looked you up online and followed it. One photo, he said, with a nice bokeh, showed that building over there in the background. From the angle I figured which one of two units on the corner you must live in. He then told me my unit number of my highrise. He stood legs akimbo ready for his sleuthing medal. I smiled wanly as my blood ran cold. My nostril may have twitched as I bolted to someone, anyone else at the party. I thought I was being careful.  

Keeping blinds closed because telescope dude pointed into our apartment and long-lensed. Why are people?

Non-binary & queer people can have public space feel

unsafe by people without boundaries. Males are also attacked. 

It’s more common for women than straight white cis men. Such a poet we billeted once went photo happy, photographing and posting our furniture and views. Probably 50 photos of our private space online. 

I’ve had 3 stalkers who also physically & sexually assaulted. That’s more common than some think.

One, after 15 years of no contact, tried emailing my public email address thus spring, a year after he last tried. Creepy. Shoo.

Never ask what’s the worst that can happen to a pessimist with ptsd and penchant for depression. 

And try to be kinder than you need to be.